It is always a good idea before beginning a new quest to check on reality as we have come to know it. So, when I started writing this article to ascertain who and what is captivating America’s Collective Consciousness, I checked the “Hot Searches” on AOL. They were as follows: American Idol, Ashley Dupre, Big Brother, and Geraldine Ferraro.

Such mixing and matching is to be expected in our hyperrealistic world. Similar, whenever I complain about the faulty writing of my students, I am often reminded that “People who live in glass houses shouldn’t throw stones.” (Popoli che abitano in case di vetro non doverebbe gettare le pietre.) It is best to just go along with the flow.

A short while ago Geraldine Ferraro threw the belated second of two missives at someone of color (qualcuno di colore). In short she had offered that “If Obama was a white man, he would not be in this position.” What she meant by “this position” of course was in front of her own favorite Presidential aspirant, and incidentally fellow white woman, Hillary Rodham Clinton. As a result she left her perch as "Honorary New York Leadership Council Chair" for the Clinton campaign so she could “speak for herself.” The first rock found its mark during the 1988 Presidential campaign of Jesse Jackson when, according to the Washington Post, she had remarked that "if Jesse Jackson were not black, he wouldn't be in the race." More troubling (disturbandosi), for us Italian Americans at least, is that when she unsuccessfully ran as Vice President in 1984 and for the Democratic New York Senate nomination in 1992 she suffered from anti-Italian bias and stereotyping.

Ex-Governor (“9”) Eliot Spitzer made a lot of enemies (molti nemici) when he was New York State’s top stone thrower. As Attorney General of the State of New York he famously went after pimps, pros, politicians, and potentates with a vengeance. Now they are returning the favors. At first he was only under a small cloud for illegally using his newly acquired authority as the Democratic Party’s Governor to persecute the Republican Party’s Senate Majority Leader Joseph Bruno in the still pending “Trooper Gate” affair. Now he’s under a massive cloud for possible criminal acts such as transporting someone across state lines for the purpose of prostitution, money laundering, misuse of campaign funds, and misuse of State funds. With a great deal of Schadenfreude Italo-americano Joe Bruno, and ex-NYSE Chairman Richard Grasso might say, “It couldn’t have happened to a nicer guy.” Eliot’s most favorite DC date Kristen (Ashley Dupre) would agree, as she is signing contract after contract to profit from the expensive assignation (convegno galante costoso). 

While we weren’t looking, New York State Lieutenant Governor David Paterson just became the first Black Governor of the State of New York, as well as America’s first Blind Governor. He has demonstrated that, with great effort (con sforzo grande), one can simultaneously overcome more than one hurdle. As Geraldine would agree, Blackness is more talked about in politics than blindness, at least blindness of the eye as opposed to blindness of the mind. It is alleged that Governor Paterson makes up for his visual limitation with a sharp wit and tongue. His oratorical prowess was quickly challenged at an Albany news conference where he was asked whether he had ever patronized a prostitute. He briefly paused and cast his first stone: “Only the lobbyists.” No one seemed to hear the tinkling glass in the background. His father Basil is a member of Meyer, Suozzi, English & Klein, PC, where according the firm’s website: “Among the more than forty labor unions the firm has as clients, Mr. Paterson (dad-babbo) personally represents Local 1199/SEIU; Local 237 (the largest Teamsters local in the U.S.); the United Federation of Teachers and Local 100/Transport Workers Union" Information about the firm can be found www.nyc.gov “Lobbyist Search.” 

Just like Hillary, Barack Obama seems to attract stone throwers. One of Barack’s top advisors, Samantha Power, threw a small stone at Hillary (called Hil’ a “monster” ((mostro)) and then resigned from the campaign. The white woman was Senator Obama’s senior foreign policy advisers. His Black Pastor, The Reverend Jeremiah Wright Jr, of Chicago’s Trinity United Church of Christ, on the other hand seems to make a living throwing stones at prominent pale persons. Television networks and web cams alike have been replaying his holy day performances during which he righteously complains that, among other things racial, America is run by rich white people. If this weren’t an election year his political homily would hardly be news worthy. In Hillaryesque fashion Obama has denounced his entertaining but nevertheless racist rants as “inflammatory and appalling (infiammatorio e spaventoso).” Reverend Wright no longer serves on Barack’s African American Religious Leadership Committee, I am told.

One thing is even more sure than death and taxes in political campaigns; more misdirected verbiage is to come, unfortunately.