I’ve been writing this blog for over five years now, it’s been a space for many different subjects--positive and negative--crossed all kinds of topics on things from the past, present, and gave peaks into the future.

CUGINE CORNER has covered on multiple times the life experiences of the “cugine,” your neighborhood friend, Italian-American cousin, or American son / grandson of Italian ancestry in the modern world who still perpetuates certain near extinct ethnic practices and retains characteristics of the hybrid east coast old school ways of the past generation goomba (paisan). I’ve covered our certain shared styles such as an affliction for jewelry with both cugines and cuginettes before.


I wear a lot of bling, from rings to bracelets and necklaces--all have meanings and one piece in particular has sparked today’s story and that’s the cornicello / cornetto / corno--A.K.A. the horn--which looks like a dangling pepper to many (it actually is modeled after a Calabrese chili pepper) but it’s worn for good fortune and to ward off the maloik (malocchio) or “evil eye.” Basically that’s an old belief of how if this ancient amulet is sported around your neck, you are protected from bad people or bad circumstances. It is seen plain or with the “little man” (Ometto) sort of our leprechaun if you will. You can also carry the plastic red version as a keychain or hang it from the rearview mirror of your Caddie.


The “rules” for it to really work and not just be a cool fashion statement are that somebody has to give one to you, you can’t go buy it yourself, and if you wear either a Crucifix or cross too, that has to be on a separate necklace because if you put both symbols on the same chain it shows both things are equal where if one is Christian or Catholic, God is #1. (Technically, if you believe in God you aren’t even supposed to give this stuff any consideration at all, but sometimes when Italian cultural beliefs intersect with religious ones, things get a little gray and nobody really has any straight answers.)


Some even wear an accompanying gold or silver “horned hand” charm next to it with the pointer finger, pinkie and thumb extended out for extra protection. You see many rockers do that devil horns sign, the difference between the two is in that case the fingers and back of the palm usually face upwards where the Italian way, they are pointing down or towards you.


Many paisans just wear these pendants mainly because they identify you as having roots from the boot and the maloik angle is really seldom believed in. I for one do not really buy into psychics or superstitions or luck. I mean maybe I do a little but not to the point where I obsess about it or check my horoscope everyday or partake in any “rituals,” like hanging garlic, etc.


One week ago in Berkeley Heights I was doing my usual walk-thru at a  feast I was working, checking out all my fellow vendors and suddenly I was stopped by this middle-aged Filipino woman from a tent with no real signs or identifiable markings. Now I don’t know if she saw me initially walking away from my stand or not, but I wasn’t wearing any Johnny Meatballs gear and had yet to identify who I was or what I did… But, she immediately acted like she knew me, or at least she claimed she knew my “spirit.” First thing she says is: “In my 30 years of practice, I never felt such a strong aura for anyone like I do for you right now!”


No, she wasn’t flirting with me, she then went on to tell me she was a fortune teller and that I should sit down for a minute. I refused, not because I was being cheap about her $10 “reading fee” but because, well, I never got any psychic reading before in my life and wasn’t in the mood for one then. Hey, if you dig that kinda thing that’s cool but it just aint my cup of tea. When I said no thanks, she closed her eyes, grabbed my arm and then just began to tell me stuff…


“One year ago…someone put the maloik on you. That is why you have had certain struggles in your life and have been looking for answers…I cannot reveal who did this but it is one of three people who you know or have known! You have one week to remove this. I can help you if you visit my office tonight or tomorrow and we sit down together. If we don’t remove this, in exactly one week you will have troubles with the law!”


-POOF!-


OK, there was actually no cloudy “poof,” or incense…she wasn’t even wearing any trippy garb and there were no tarot cards or lamps like Madam Ruby had in “Pee-wee’s Big Adventure.” I didn’t ask her if my bicycle was in the basement of the Alamo, I don’t even have a bike. But I was a tad, just a tad weirded out. This was all just BS right? When I asked her how I could possibly have the maloik and then pointed to my chain with the horn, she said that it could not help with this case. The fact that this woman specifically used the word “maloik,” which is really the slang way of saying malocchio and knew about the Italian horn and did not simply say I had a curse on me was what kind of got me most freaked out. Unless the horn and maloik is typical in other cultures which I did not think it was, how could a lady who did not know me at all or even see my chain know about this?


When I told my wife she said it’s typical that these “entertainers” research every ancient belief, old wives tale, lucky (and unlucky) curse and spell of every culture and that it’s pretty obvious I look like a paisan even if I didn’t have a Johnny Meatballs shirt on. And that’s why she knew her talking maloik would resonate with me. Anyway, I went on with my evening that night, made it home safe and went to bed. But this weird experience was still on my mind. I figured I would just be extra careful for the week, I wasn’t going to her office to finish this. I did wonder who these three people could possibly be that would wanna cause me harm or have some vendetta. Could it be my ex-wife?! My current wife?! Frankie Antipasto?! Nahhhhhhhh……


The next day I had the Fort Lee Farmers Market and it rained in the early morning hours and the roads were a bit slick. As I made my way towards Fort Lee there are quite a few up and down hills once you get off Route 46 and enter Pal Park. And that’s when I almost demolished the Ball Bus and myself as I could not stop going down a hill. All of a sudden my brakes just went--as if they snapped and if not for slamming on the emergency brake, I would have probably crashed into another car or a tree. No harm done, I made it to the market and went on my way and brought the bus in to my mechanic the next day. Nobody cut my brake lines as I was beginning to suspect and it is now fixed and fine.


Next few days were uneventful and I had forgotten about this whole silly thing. But by Thursday, it just slightly entered into my mind again because I did have a court appearance for an old ticket. Nothing serious but that was involving “the law.” Hmmm… Despite the fact that I was in court for over 2 hours and would rather go to the dentist or DMV than sit through that mess again, I got out of there with no incident, paid my fine and that was that. So now I was really feeling in the clear!


But….then the next day I was at my mother’s house and she had a horrible migraine headache. In fact she said she hadn’t had one that bad in years and she was laying down. When she got up I was telling her a little bit about this psychic situation and she commented how strange it was I mentioned maloik because whenever she had migraine headaches, my grandmother would do the reverse-maloik routine on her and she was just thinking about that. For those that don’t know, the real old school folks like our grandmothers and great-grandmothers would actually have the power to remove this maloik by reciting some kind of lines in Italian and doing this trick with a bowl of water and olive oil. I was a little kid but I do remember my grandmother doing this on my mother in her kitchen from time to time. So I asked my mother if she knew how to do it and yes she does know exactly how to do it but that she cold not do it on herself however could perform it on me.


I respectfully declined the offer and figured I had made it through the past six days so why waste the water especially with all these ice buckets out there. No incidents yesterday and now today I have another event, this time in River Vale. I will have Cugine Bobby there with me again like I did last week---he said this whole thing is baloney but he too does wear the gold horn. The way I see it, if I can survive to midnight tonight that will be exactly one week and then it will prove that this whole thing was hogwash and I did not need any further readings or rituals or anything to save me from gloom and doom.


Now if she could only predict how many people will come to my next gig I will know exactly how many balls to roll. My mother always said it’s a sin to waste food. Guess I’ll take my chances. Wish me luck.